WTF IS HAPPENING, HOW DID WE GET HERE!?

Chon Pryor
May 29
3 min read

— a blog that reads like a journal for the soul, written by a man doing the deep work to understand himself, heal himself, in an attempt lead others to do the same.

WTF Is Happening, How Did We Get Here?

Chon Pryor - Husband, Father, Vet, Hip Hop MC, Development Advocate — Chon Pryor (Cpx3) - Figuring it out.

Part 1: Strange Places and Shadow Work

By Chon Pryor

I’m starting this blog from a place I can only describe as… strange.

Not in the twilight zone kind of way, but more like the silent moments between your thoughts when you stop everything and wonder: WTF is happening? How did I even get here?

I don’t say that lightly. I’ve spent the last few years doing a whole lot of doing — husband, father, business owner, MC, speaker, community leader, idea man. My name is Chon Pryor, and on paper, it probably looks like I have some things figured out. And in many ways, I do.

But it doesn’t always feel like that.

It feels like a constant fight just to reach the point where I can say, with certainty, “This is who I am. This is what I’m here to do,” While having that backed by the financial evidence, And I don’t mean that surface-level ‘branding’ kind of clarity. I mean the deep-rooted, soul-level “this is my divine assignment” kind of knowing. The type of peace that doesn’t shake when life does.

Ever since I developed a sense of self-awareness — I’ve felt… different. I’ve never truly felt like I belonged. I’ve walked through this world with a sense of otherness — asking questions that don’t seem to have answers. What is life? Why is life? Why do we love, hurt, heal, break, strive, or settle? Why does pain exist, and why does it feel so familiar?

These days, it’s like I’m overheating. Like my brain’s a device with 36 tabs open and too many apps running. I want to shut down. But I don’t. Because if I stop — I fall behind. And behind feels like death in a world that worships hustle.

So now I’m here, trying to pause — not to stop, but to look back. To reflect. To unpack. I guess you could call this a backtrack mission. Some people call it “shadow work. ”Some call it healing. For me?

It's survival.

Because I feel like I am a lot. But sometimes, it feels like… not enough.

At 34, I can say with confidence: I’ve become a reputable human being. I’ve earned respect. I’ve made people proud. I’m a husband. A father. A voice. A vessel. People recognize me as a musician, a speaker, a creator, a connector, a builder.

And yet, I’m still asking myself…

What am I really supposed to be doing? I’ve got ideas for days. Visions stacked in my notes app like blueprints waiting on a builder. But when it comes to full-on commitment and execution? I stutter-step. I hesitate.

And I’m beginning to ask myself the real questions:

Am I afraid of success? Am I afraid of the comfort that might cost me the things I love the most — like my time, my peace, my freedom?

I want to do something meaningful. Be someone meaningful. But I don’t want to trade the very things that give life meaning just to get there. What a twisted loop.

So again —How did I get here?

I don’t fully know yet. But I’m willing to walk through the memories, the lessons, the trauma, the patterns, the wins, the losses, the fears — and write it all out as honestly as I can. Not just for me. But maybe for you too — if you’ve ever felt the same way.

If this is hitting you somewhere deep, I invite you to follow me on this blog as I keep unpacking, unlearning, and rebuilding. This isn’t a “how to” journey. It’s more of a “let’s find out together.”

This is WTF Is Happening, How Did We Get Here? And this is only part one.